What we didn't have

It's a total cliche to say that we want to give our kids what we didn't have when we were growing up, but I think I can safely say that we all feel this way in one way or another.
Some want their kids to have toys, clothes, or vacations. Other's will want to give them freedom of expression, spiritual direction, or a stable home. For me, I always wanted my kids to have Grandparents.

As a kid, I rarely felt jealous of what the other kids had. My mom taught us to be compassionate towards others, and with that lesson we learned to be grateful for what we had. (see previous post "Nosotros los pobres...). However, I can distinctly remember the first time I felt the painful realization that there were things out there that I could not have, no matter how badly I wanted it, how hard I worked for it, or how much my parents tried to get it for me.

It happened in the 4th grade. Lucy O. And I were walking to my uncle's house after school and we stopped into her Grandma's house along the way. It wasn't what I expected a Grandma's house to look like. Having not had one, I only had what I saw on TV to go by. I thought she'd be a sweet little old lady with white hair, an impeccable house, and warm cookies on the table. That she was not. I remember feeling pretty shocked that she had long messy black hair, her house was a wreck, she smoked, and *gasp* said "sh_t" in front of us! After the initial shock wore off, I sat down on her ratty old couch to process the death of my dream and watch the Home Shopping Network. I was utterly disappointed. Maybe Grandmothers weren't all they were cracked up to be!

Then, after putting out her menthol cigarette she went into her room and came out with a box and handed it to Lucy. "Here Honey, I saw this on the Home Shopping Network and decided to get you one!". Lucy excitedly opened the box while I looked on. It was sparkley red watch. Before we left, her Grandma reminded her to pack the "off to Grandma's" suitcase she had gotten her for her overnight stay on Friday. When we resumed our walk to the sitters, I asked Lucy why her grandma got her a present. Was it her birthday? "No, my grandma just likes to get me stuff". I remember thinking that she was so lucky to have someone besides her parents that would buy her stuff "just because", and how cool it must be to just be able to stop by her house to hang out or to stay the weekend...No matter how ratty the place, It was on that day that I wished that I too had a pink suitcase that said "Off to Grandma's"

It is such a JOY that our Aimee is abundantly experiencing the love and attention of all 4 of her grandparents...And even one extra by "adoption". The enraptured look on their faces when they see her is beyond any words I can think of to describe. It is one of the most beautiful feelings to know that your child is loved so deeply by people that mean so much to you. I realize that there are certain things that I didn't have growing up that I may never be able to provide for Aimee, so I thank God that she already has what I didn't.

For Images related to this post, please click on Aimee's Photo Album.